Writing on Air

My son Mio had always wanted a motorcycle which from day one, his mom and I had always had a problem accepting, much less encouraging. At every conceivable opportunity, we would always mention the pitfalls of owning one. But my son Mio persisted. He worked hard to save money and spent hours upon hours online and on the road searching for THE ONE he wanted. It had to be a specific model and cc that conformed to his taste for vintage and for the requirements of the state of NSW for one just starting bike. When he got one, he was so proud and happy. It took him weeks to learn, take the test, pass, practice at night when there are few cars on the road before going on his first ride to the City. He also purchased a helmet, jacket and all the stuff bikers need to be safe.

This afternoon, I got a text from Lydia that Walter, Mio’s best friend had taken the bike and got into an accident. From what I can gather, he slid on some gravel, and ended up under a caravan. My wife and Mio brought him to the hospital where he is at the moment being treated for some injuries. I still don’t know how serious it is but it seems he did not hit his head which is good. The bike, alas, was totaled.

Aside from feeling bad about his friend, Mio is (as my wife described it), ‘beyond upset’ for obvious reasons. I texted him to console him. I said that while I was upset that Walter was hurt, as his father I am somewhat relieved that it was not him who was in the accident. Material things come and go. That can be settled later. I did not have to advice him to be with his friend. Mio has always valued his friendships.

Even when we know things will eventually get better, as a father, I suffer as well when my children are inconvenienced, hurt in any way. But, life happens. They must deal with it. I only hope he gets second thoughts about buying another one after seeing how easily accidents can happen.

Just got a new message from my wife. Mio, though upset, told her, ‘Ma, it’s only a bike. I hope Walt is OK.’

* * *
Yesterday, I picked up one of my guitars after not playing the instrument for over a month. I was in Sydney all that time and even if I have a nice Aussie-made Maton guitar there, I hardly even touched it. Have not been feeling musical these days. But yesterday, here at my house in Manila, I opened my guitar case and picked up my newly renovated Gibson guitar and played it for close to an hour. It was like spending time with an old flame that one’s heart still beats for. It was wonderful, to put it easily. I sang a few songs I used to sing in high school.

I noticed two things immediately though: my fingers hurt from lack of playing for awhile, and it took me some time to warm up vocally to reach the notes I used to reach much easier a few months ago. I must go back to the artists’ credo of ‘practice, practice, and most importantly, more practice.’ It never stops.

* * *

Slept this afternoon. I think I am still jet-lagged. I sleep late and wake up too early. The 3 hours difference between Sydney and Manila is quite hard to shrug off. I can handle the time difference between manila and the US better, strangely enough.

I have also taken to coffee in my 60th year of existence. I have been a non-coffee drinker since I was born. Masarap pala. My wife who is a strong coffee drinker, and my daughter Ala who supervises a Starbucks store in Sydney’s Darling Harbor have been guiding me through the pleasures that caffeine can deliver to the body. How did I miss out on this all these years..

Growing up, I always thought coffee was one addiction I could live without. I also do not smoke and hardly drink. But at age 60, one can begin to allow these ‘vices’.

* * *
1) Basic Photography classes on Saturday, Feb. 18, from 1 to 6:30 p.m. Cost is P3,920. Venue is at 113 B. Gonzales, Loyola Heights, QC. Call 426-5375 or 0916-8554303 to reserve.

2) Songwriting Workshop on Sunday, Feb. 19, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.. Learn the basics and actually write songs during the session. Very hands on! Student must play the guitar or the piano. Venue is at 113 B. Gonzales, Loyola Heights, QC. Call 426-5375 or 0916-8554303 to reserve.

HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes (The Philippine Star) Updated January 29, 2012

Giving is difficult. That is understandable because in giving, you give up something. You may even feel like you’ve not just given something away but that you have given up a part of yourself. It may feel like you’ve lost something tangible. And, in truth, you do.

And even when you are very willing to give something to someone, it can be scary. The fear is that your gift will be not be accepted well, or that it will say something about you, the giver, that is unpleasant or not too flattering. For example, nobody wants to be called a cheapskate.

Accepting a gift is also not so simple. It can be fraught with awkwardness. One is not sure how to accept a gift for a variety of reasons. For one, you, the receiver, may feel unworthy of the gift being offered, or you may feel that the giver is greatly inconvenienced because he is parting with a something of great value. Often, the natural reaction is to refuse the gift so as not to be burdened by the inconvenience, perceived or imagined, that the giver goes through.

I believe that both giving and receiving must be done with grace and sensitivity.

One of the things I regret is that I do not possess any material memento from my father who died too early in my life. Even as his sterling reputation has guided me for the most part of my life, I still wish I had something that he possessed, something he valued, that was important to him. He left his family with very little. One of them was his sword, a fine epee which was part of his uniform as a Knight of Columbus. Its handle was of gold and mother of pearl, and it came in a leather sheath with gold trimmings.

When it was my turn to be a dad, I swore that I would give my kids important souvenirs, meaningful items they can cherish after I have gone. I do not mean cell phones, iPads or anything trendy like that. I want to give them valuable things with historical and symbolic significance that they can pass on to their children someday. It will be my way of creating family traditions while I am still a part of their lives.

Eighteen years ago, at the height of my passion for collecting timepieces, I struggled with myself whether or not I should get a Breitling Navitimer watch. It was expensive and the frugal Ilocano in me could not justify the extravagance. I thought of other reasons to justify the acquisition — that it was my gift to myself for working so hard, or it would be more valuable someday. My daughter Erica who was shopping with me at the Shangri-la Mall asked me what was so special about the watch. I replied that it was a watch for life. I explained that it was a finely-crafted watch, and it was valuable and would one day have the status of a family heirloom.

Without any hesitation, she advised me to purchase it pronto since, if it is a watch for life, further dilly-dallying would be a waste of my limited time on earth. Her refreshing take was all the justification I needed. Within a few minutes, I purchased the watch.
I wore the watch off and on the first 12 years after I bought it. But in the last six years, I have worn it constantly. It is an automatic which, if left unused for days, has to be wound. Its hand movement is smooth and consistent unlike a digital watch whose second hand moves briskly and in a jerky fashion. I love it. It looks very manly — expensive but rugged.

It isn’t a conservative-looking gold watch the type that executives wear. This looks like one that active, imaginative and adventurous people like pilots, car racers, sailors, explorers, athletes or hip but serious musicians would use.

On my last visit to my family in Sydney, my conversations with my son Mio revolved around his future plans. He is looking into courses, training that will set him on a career path for life. He has lately been making decisions that are truly his own, sometimes contrary to the parental advice that his mother and I tend to lay on thick. He has a job that pays okay and I know he is enjoying this surge of independence and power that young people feel when they earn their own money and can purchase things. When we went out to eat, he would offer to pay the bill, or at least pay for his own share.

As a parent, I delighted in his independent thinking and persistence in following his dreams. He is really growing up and coming into his own.

For many years now, I had wanted to give him something valuable that would not just bond us as father and son but also something utilitarian that he could use for a long time. And so, during our last lunch together, as we talked about how quickly time had flown since our move to Australia, I took off my Breitling Navigator watch and gave it to him. He was a bit shocked, and he immediately refused, saying that he did not even wear a watch. I told him that it was one reason why I was giving it to him.

“Real men wear watches,” I told him, only half-joking. Besides, it would go well with his new motorcycle which he had saved up for and recently purchased against our advice.

I told him that the watch had kept time for me for many years. It reminded me of my schedules, birthdays, anniversaries and other important milestones, and also less memorable moments like the mere passing of time. It also kept me from being late, and it gave me a sense of urgency. It was now time for this valuable piece of equipment to help another person live his life in a more orderly fashion. “Time is fleeting,” I said, as I gave it to him.

After a while, he sensed my seriousness and the importance of what I was doing. He still balked a little knowing how expensive the watch was. I told him that it was also for that very reason that I was giving it — because it had great value. “It’s not really giving unless the gift is of value,” I told him.

At that point, he smiled and I knew he got the point as he accepted my gift graciously. He was quite profuse in showing his appreciation and gratitude. Within minutes, he already had a picture of it on his Facebook page.

I felt good about parting with my watch. It will be of good use if only to remind my son that youth does not last long; one must not waste much time. Eventually, he must seriously tackle more meaningful pursuits in life.

More than the material value of my timepiece, I felt it was appropriate to give it to one who is on the threshold of life. And I like the idea of passing on something from father to son. It is a memento of sorts for us, something sacred that binds us in some way.

It is true that when one gives, one also receives. Someone once said, “Fragrance clings to the hand that gives the rose.” I felt I received something of value when I gave my watch to my son. I felt his appreciation and the strengthening of ties between us. It was father-son moment and I felt good about how well we both handled it, with grace and sensitivity, traits that are not overtly masculine, but are life skills that are part of the gift of wisdom.

* * *

1) Basic Photography classes on Saturday, Feb. 18, from 1 to 6:30 p.m. Cost is P3,920. Venue is at 113 B. Gonzales, Loyola Heights, QC. Call 426-5375 or 0916-8554303 to reserve.

2) Songwriting Workshop on Sunday, Feb. 19, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.. Learn the basics and actually write songs during the session. Very hands on! Student must play the guitar or the piano. Venue is at 113 B. Gonzales, Loyola Heights, QC. Call 426-5375 or 0916-8554303 to reserve.

HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes (The Philippine Star) Updated January 22, 2012 12:00 AM

Maturity is a fearsome word. People tend to equate it with suffering. They see the word “mature” and think of people who are “responsible,” lacking in spontaneity and carefreeness — and boring. They see killjoys who think in terms of responsibilities, duties, “have-tos,” commitments, promises.

There are singles who find perplexing couples who suffer in relationships but stay in them because it is the mature thing to do to painfully sort out their issues. They don’t have the patience or the commitment, emotionally and psychologically, for such an effort. And they ask, why not just change partners when the thrill is gone, or when it’s time to change?

They see people working hard to send their kids to school, pay for a house, and they are daunted by the hardship and sacrifices involved. Why not just relax and take it easy? Life is too short. They see such people depriving themselves of instant gratification, even if some of them can afford it.

The world as we know it today seems bent on making life more convenient, easy, attractive, and yes, as pain-free as possible. Every new invention is designed to make things more efficient, less uncomfortable, more pleasurable, and more time-saving for people. “New” and ‘latest’ items often mean they are meant to bring less pain. And people are more and more hooked on to these selling points.

The perception that maturity is scary may have real basis since we see so many “mature” people who live lives that involve suffering. But to be mature, or to have the intellectual, emotional, psychological and spiritual gravitas to navigate through life, demands that we look beyond modern enticements and understand more deeply how life really works. And it starts by accepting that the promise of modern life is an incomplete picture.

The whole idea of being mature is developing the ability to understand reality and deal with it. There are bills to be paid. There are emotional and psychological hurdles to overcome in order to love fully. Life, in its glorious and gory splendor, must be dealt with. Painful decisions and consequences must be faced, and this demands not just the capacity to enjoy life but also to accept suffering.

To be mature is to comprehend and accept that there are a lot of things going on in the world aside from one’s whims and preferences that often do not coincide with the way we want to live. We either become stubborn and reject the world as it is or we adapt to it. To be mature is to accept that one must suffer for a time until lessons are learned and the world is understood. It is the taming of the wild, juvenile and immature spirit in us. It is only after a long while and after great effort that the pain becomes more tolerable, and starts to ease.

Undeniably, there are also moments when reality and all its issues may be downright pleasurable, and we don’t even have to exert any effort in making it so. And we thank God for such strokes of good luck or that things are going our way. To a mature person, much of life becomes pleasurable simply because he has prepared and mastered himself to respond correctly to the situations that may arise.

In other words, we can still get your kicks whether we are disciplined and mature or irresponsible and immature. But I think the mature person, in the end, gets more kicks and in greater quality, than the immature one who will always need to search for more but enjoy it less and less. This is because the immature guy becomes a slave to his pleasures, while the mature one is less dependent on them, and less demanding about how life should show up.

When it comes to suffering, the opposite experience may happen. The mature person who has learned that life is bigger than his caprices, whims and drives may face suffering head-on but actually suffer less and still get some meaning out of it, while the hopelessly immature, in facing the same set of circumstances, may suffer more and find everything a total waste of time.

Mastering oneself is a big part of mastering reality, and that means knowing oneself both subjectively and objectively. It is to be intimate with ones’ inner life and yet have the ability to step aside and see oneself in the third person.

When you know yourself, you become less and less the issue when you deal with life. While we can never really and completely get out of ourselves, life becomes less about our untamed egos. It is not so much about us but about other people and the larger life outside of us.

Maturity involves balance and wisdom. Former US First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt put it most eloquently when she said, “A mature person is one who does not think only in absolutes, who is able to be objective even when deeply stirred emotionally, who has learned that there is both good and bad in all people and all things, and who walks humbly and deals charitably.”

Maturity is not just about doing the ‘right’ thing but knowing when we should do it. It is not just about “correcting” the world of its ills even if we sometimes do. It is more about dealing with oneself and others and trying to find the best way to make things easier for everyone. It is certainly not about being perfect or feeling that one has done well. It is about self-acceptance in the deepest sense. It was the theologian and philosopher Paul Tillich who wrote, “The awareness of the ambiguity of one’s highest achievements (as well as one’s deepest failures) is a definite symptom of maturity.”

Sometimes, I wonder how mature I really am and I shudder at what I see. To be sure, I have matured a lot in many ways since my youth. But there is more to learn. Maturity involves life-long learning. One thing I have learned is this: When I was young and less mature, the world seemed to force me into circumstances. I was happy or sad because of how the world was. It dictated my moods. Now, I feel I have a choice on how to feel about life. It does not matter how the cards are dealt. I will choose to live it as best as I can.

* * *

My first workshop for the year!

If you got a DSLR camera for Christmas, now is the time to learn to use it. Take great pics throughout the year and beyond. Basic Photography is on Jan. 28 from p.m. to 6:30 p.m. at 113 B. Gonzales, Varsity Hills, QC. It’s the street across Miriam College. Fee is P3,920 (includes VAT). Call 0916-8554303 to reserve or write to jpfotojim@gmail.com. See you.

It’s a new year and a new beginning. It is a cliché but it is something to ponder. Beginnings are generally good things that bring real, great hope.

My spiritual practice is defined by the idea of focusing on beginnings. There is something fresh about a start, a new experience, or an undertaking. It awakens us to new things and makes us feel alive. Making ourselves available to the unfolding moments in a day is not just a practice in itself, it is the practice. And this practice starts with waking up to a blank day.

I am talking about a day that is not the day following some yesterday, or a day before a tomorrow with a rigid agenda and a set routine. I am talking about something so pristine and practically untouched by anything that has come before it — a day brimming with potential. And I know that is literally possible since I have had days when I have new, seminal experiences, completely unique ideas, or I am doing things I have never done before, and it feels great.

These days, the thought of an entirely new year has me so excited. I am looking at dozens of weeks, hundreds of days, thousands of hours, 525,600 minutes, and so many millions of seconds waiting to be explored, animated, filled up, emptied, breathed life into and lived in any way that I wish. If that isn’t exciting, I don’t know what is.

Some 14 years ago, I had my first encounter with Zen and I immediately embraced its focus on the moment — not some special moment but every ordinary moment we live. These moments become special to us simply because we sanctify them with our attention. I was being asked to pay attention. That was the simple practice. I have learned a lot, but I still have not mastered it.

I have learned and continue to learn that the more you pay attention, the more you become awake, and the more you are awake, the more you become accident prone — yes, accident prone to the gift of kensho, or satori: enlightenment. This is the great moment when, to put it simply and dispassionately, everything in the universe is experienced as being in its proper place.

And yet, there is no difference between a moment of kensho and a moment of mundane living. What makes certain moments different or special is the fact that we make it special. When you think about it, every moment is of infinite potential. There is essentially no difference where one is or what one is doing. The universe and its gifts are in every place you are in, and in whatever you are doing. The ordinary moment is clothed with great invisible power waiting to be recognized by the awakened mind.

At 60, I have much to look forward to this year. New moments and opportunities will present themselves which I will shape to what I want to experience. And at the same time, I will humble myself and accept their gifts, and allow myself be shaped by them.

This year, my musical side wishes to express itself through many shows I would like to do everywhere I can, and new songs that I wish to write, sing, record and perform. I am also excited to do a lot of photography with great passion and dedication while continuously learning new skills. At the same time, I wish to start writing my fifth book and finish it. I once told myself that I wish to write 20 books before I conk out. I have not written one in five years. It’s time to do it again. There are also social concerns to get passionate about which I am sure will make this year a very exciting one for me.

There is so much playing out in life. There are many things that demand our time and attention. Life demands that we multi-task to be able to put things in order. The job, family, relationships, our social lives, our duties and responsibilities to society, faith, home and individual lives are all important. But in the context of beginnings and fresh starts, what is important is how we respond to all of these.

The common response to many of the things we have to do is to simply do them the way we have been doing in the past. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. If there’s nothing wrong, why change it? And it makes sense to use a formula that is tried and tested and that works.

But what about the things that do not work too well? There are areas in our lives that do not serve us as well as others, where our responses (or even the lack of it), do not give us positive results or experiences. These need a new approach, a new mindset, clear thinking and fresh takes. These call for new beginnings.
I have always felt that my capacity to jettison old hurts, disappointments and failures and start again has served me well. My wife often gets impatient with me when I can’t remember directions on the road, or have a hard time doing things around the house — things she finds so easy to do. In such moments, instead of allowing myself to become negative or defensive, I focus on learning. The important thing is the moment and that is all I have to pay attention to until I eventually get it. And it is always a beginning. There is always something new to learn. In a Zen frame of mind, there is no such thing as repetition.

Tonight, before I sat down to write this article, I played my iPod and sang to minus-one tracks of some APO songs that I used to sing with Danny and Boboy. When we were still a trio, I hardly sang solo; my instinct was mostly to blend in and make sure that the sound of three was like the sound of one united effort. In a way, it meant holding back, filling in the gaps in volume, and shaping one’s voice to fit the sound we wanted as a group.

As a solo artist now, I find a new thrill singing to the music of APO’s hits. I phrase the words the way I want to without having to blend in. I also push notes upward or inflect and bend melodies in ways I find interesting. I feel like a fresh new artist singing new songs, even if, in fact, I have done these songs with APO thousands of times.

We have all lived our lives, and I may have lived longer than most of you, my readers. But you may be able to relate when I say that there are many ways to “de-routinize” life and make it fresh, new and exciting — a new beginning always.

And even when things do come to an end, just as the last effort comes to a halt and things stop, the moment is merely a pause while it waits for us to begin something new.

Since we are fated to be perpetual beginners, it makes sense to learn the art of it by always beginning our lives anew — fresh, blank and unsullied by the past.

* * *

My first workshop for the year!

If you got a DSLR camera for Christmas, now is the time to learn to use it. Take great pics throughout the year and beyond. Basic Photography is on Jan. 28 from 1 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. at 113 B. Gonzales, Varsity Hills, QC. It’s the street across Miriam College. Fee is P3,920 (includes VAT). Call 0916-8554303 to reserve or write to jpfotojim@gmail.com. See you.

Maturity is something a lot of people fear. I think know why. They equate it with suffering. They see ‘mature’ and think of people being ‘responsible’ and they do not like what they see. They see killjoys. They see responsibility. For example, they see people suffering in a relationship but staying in it because it is the mature thing to do to painfully sort out issues. Why not just have partners and change when the thrill is gone, or when it’s time to change? They see people working hard to send kids to school, pay for a house because it is the mature thing to do when you raise a family. Why not just relax and take it easy? They see people depriving themselves of instant gratification even if they can afford it.

And the perception may have real basis because they see so many ‘mature’ people suffering in the world.
But I would like to say, what people are seeing is is an incomplete picture.
The whole idea in being mature is to develop the ability to understand reality and deal with it. There are bills to be paid. There are things to hurdle emotionally, psychologically in order to love fully. Life has to be dealt with. Painful decisions must be faced. And that demands some sort of suffering.

To be mature is to comprehend and accept that there are a lot of things going on in the world aside from one’s whims, likes and preferences. It is to suffer for a time until lessons are learned and the world is understood. It is the taming of the wild, juvenile and immature spirit. After a while and with great effort, it becomes less painful, more tolerable and then the suffering eases a great deal. And then, there may even come episodes where reality and all its issues may become a downright pleasurable experience.

It is true you can get kicks whether you are disciplined and mature or irresponsible and immature. But I think the mature guy in the end gets more of it in greater quality while the immature will need more but enjoy it less and less. Why? Because he becomes a slave to his pleasures and likes, while the mature get less dependent, less demanding on how life should show up to ease the pain of living and to experience joy.
Mastering oneself is a big part of mastering reality. When you know yourself, you become less and less the issue when you deal with life. Whatever presents itself, you can deal with it.

Have you ever wondered why bad things happen to good people? That must be one of the big questions of all time. Some people will say it’s because He has something better for us after. Others will say it is punishment. I don’t buy either.

The truth is, we will probably never know. We can only speculate. I can’t pretend to be sure of my answer but the only thing I can think of is this: God does not value the material world, our health and material bodies included. It matters not to God if they all come or go. Look how quickly fortunes of men change. Observe how physical beauty fades. If they were of utmost importance, God would treat them with greater care. One monsoon, earthquake or any natural disasters and they all disappear.

It seems the only thing that matters is what is indestructible, what is eternal–and it is that which has no beginning, was never born, and will never end. The eternal aspect of who we are–Christians call it the soul, other religions call it something else, is what I am pointing to here.

Notice how our conversation with God qualitatively changes when bad things happen. We immediately ask for material deliverance. There is no logic to how God decides about who gets spared and who doesn’t. But one thing sure is, God seems to want to crack you open and tell you that you are bigger than what you think. Concentrate on things that last–eternal stuff. That’s the real stuff you are made of, not your possessions, not even your body.

* * *

If God made a survey and asked how many bothered to see the sunrise today, I think She would be severely disappointed. I don’t think 1% of people on earth cared about the morning light show yesterday or today. And they will probably not care tomorrow.

And yet God continues to keep these things going–glorious sunrises and sunsets, blue skies, marvelous life forms in the oceans, stars at night, a nice soft wind, just to name a few.. Why?

Hmm.. My guess is, God is God and that’s how a God behaves.

God simply can’t help being marvelous.

* * *

HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes (The Philippine Star) Updated January 01, 2012 12:00

This manghuhula never learns. My predictive accuracy last year was dismal, although I did get one thing correct: “Everyone alive will be a year older, blink their eyes, inhale, exhale and eat. All these will cause ecological impact.” It’s that time of year when the right combination of forces makes foretelling attractive, perhaps even inevitable. As we bid the old year adieu and the New Year enters, and as I stare at the third bottle of beer I have consumed in an hour, I am moved to go out on a limb and risk being way wrong, ridiculous or even crazy for all these things I am about to reveal to you, dear reader.

And so, in the spirit of the New Year’s revelry where we are allowed to wipe away all traces of the past year and start with a clean slate, I boldly present my new, fresh predictions for 2012. But I do so with a caveat. If they happen, I take full credit for them. If they don’t, then I will simply say that the beer made me do it!

1. Fed up with traffic, angry motorists in Metro Manila will stage an Occupy EDSA and C5 but will immediately realize they’ve already been doing it all this time.

2. The trend in skin whitening will take a strange turn. Because of the economic situation, Filipino women will apply glutathione only sparingly and partially. The result will be known as “high contrast,” which is somewhere between the look of the rock group KISS, and 1,001 Dalamatians and will land many Pinays on the covers of fashion and beauty magazines all over the world.

3. Kim Kardashan will marry Kim Jong Un. Her presence in the young Great Leader’s life will bring out his softer side and will result in North Korea giving up its nuclear ambitions. In turn, Kim Kardashian will end hunger in the country by breastfeeding half the population.

4. The Corona impeachment will lead to a full, no-holds-barred fight between the executive and judiciary branches, prompting boxing promoter Bob Arum to enter the picture and make this a world event, saying, “We’re back in the heavyweight business, and we’re thrilled to be involved.”

5. Dr. Vicki Belo, famous cosmetologist, will make a bid to improve NAIA. She will give the entire building a facial scrub, have the walls peeled, the front waiting area enlarged, and all the ugliness liposuctioned. This will make for a smoother, softer NAIA. When she is done, she promises that NAIA will henceforth be known as the Gateway to the Stars.

6. Kim Jong Un will be predicted to become the longest living North Korean ruler, outlasting the longevity of the combined rule of the two previous Kims. Pundits are betting on this because, quite understandably, both his father Kim Jong Il, and his grandfather Kim Il Sung were already “Il” to start with.

7. Atty. Ferdinand Topacio will quit being the lawyer of CGMA, and end his law career. He will surprise everyone by resurfacing late in 2012 as a rap artist. He will rename himself Topac after his idol Tupac. He will be a sensation!

8. Publicly known gays will guest on talk shows and shock everyone by openly admitting that they are actually closet machos. They will ride onto the set on motorcycles, expose gigantic tattoos of Marilyn Monroe and Madonna, drink beer and fart, and publicly profess their passion for cockfighting, FHM centerfolds and calendars selling alcoholic beverages.

9. In a highly publicized bid, Lolong, the biggest crocodile in the world, will be bought by Lacoste.

10. Psychologists will seriously study the phenomenon of public officials who suddenly get sick after facing arrest. They will come to the conclusion that not unlike Lolong, the largest crocodile in captivity, they go though a cycle of depression and not eating. But they eventually regain their appetite after two months in captivity.
11. In its bid to be the top TV station, ABC-5, after raiding the stables of its top two rivals, will end its talent acquisition with the signing up of… God!

12. The end of the world as predicted by the Mayan calendar will occur on Dec. 21, 2012. But before it does, many secrets will be finally revealed. Some questions in the long list of mysteries that have baffled mankind will at long last be explained. Among them will be: Are there aliens living among us? Is there an afterlife? And what actually happens when you mix Mentos with Coke?

13. CGMA will finally be allowed to leave the country after her handpicked doctors, spiritual advisers and the Supreme Court confirm that she is, beyond doubt, possessed by an alien evil spirit. After an exhaustive but futile search for the right exorcist or espiritista in the Philippines who can decipher the foreign language she is involuntarily speaking, she will be allowed to board a plane and search for the exorcist who can decipher the alien tongue, and thus cure her. She will then tour the world in search of a “cure.”

14. Since Floyd Mayweather has been sentenced to jail for domestic violence, his eagerly expected fight with Manny Paquiao will not push though on May 5. However, to appease angry fans who have been anticipating this fight, the two pugilists will decide to have it out in a non-titled tussle. Manny Pacquiao will want the fight in Manila with Mareng Winnie as referee, but Mayweather will insist that the fight be held on the Jerry Springer show in June 2012.

15. To speed up the law-making process in both houses of Congress, Twitter rules will be followed. All speeches, deliberations, arguments, cross-examinations should not exceed 140 characters. Only Senator Lito Lapid will fare well under the new set-up. Many will decide not to run for reelection. However, the approval ratings of Congress and the Senate will shoot sky-high, since the public will hardly hear from their elected representatives.

16. The Freedom of Information act will finally be passed into law. People will finally know whether or not the President plays video games, questions about sexuality of certain public figures will finally be answered, and why we suddenly have so many Koreans in the Philippines. With the wealth of such vital information gathered and revealed, we will become a world power in six months.

17. The RH bill will finally be passed into law. In an unsual partnership, the program will be carried out by DOH and Globe and Smart telecoms. Since it has been discovered that Wi-Fi signals lessen sperm production, the whole nation will have free access to broadband as a supplement to the RH provisions.

18. Because of the overeating you, dear reader, have been doing this past week, you will most likely suffer from indigestion today and, already I apologize for this very bad pun, you will know what its is like to be an “Empacho-an” victim.

Manigong Bagong Taon sa Ating Lahat!

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Got a camera last Christmas? Come and attend my first Basic Photography Workshop on Jan. 28, 2012. Document the coming year with great pics. It will be from 1 to 6:30 p.m. in QC. Call 0916-8554303/426-5375 to reserve P3,920 includes VAT. See you.

HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes (The Philippine Star) Updated December 25, 2011 12:00 AM

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llustration by REY RIVERA

Mass burials, over-stretched funeral parlor services, a dearth of coffins and formalin. There were bodies that were going to be dumped in the landfill in Cagayan de Oro, for lack of space to keep them anywhere.

It is six days before Christmas as I write this. A pall of gloom has severely dampened the nation’s spirits. The Christmas spirit seems to be farther away than ever. On Twitter and Facebook, there are those who have become very sensitive and see even the President’s attending the Christmas party of the Presidential Security Group as tasteless and insensitive.

I will not delve into anything remotely connected to politics. It’s Christmas, and that’s the last thing I wish to do. But it is important to ask real questions during a situation like this. Should we be celebrating Christmas when there is so much suffering around? Is it inappropriate, insensitive, immoral to have a good time when many of our brethren are cold, homeless, starving — in great need?

My mother used to tell us about a bleak Christmas during the Second World War when there was very little to eat. Of course, it also meant there were few gifts to give and to receive. What they had on the table was a simple, humble meal of fish and a prayer of thanks that they were all alive, unhurt and together. When I heard such stories even as a boy, I felt they had a spiritual dimension.

A good friend of my wife Lydia who spent a year in Iran during the revolution recalls what Christmas was like in a society that did not recognize or celebrate it, and was/is at times even hostile to Christianity and its celebrations. She had just married an Iranian. Everything was alien to her. She barely understood the language, customs, geography, religion and culture of the place. The city of Tehran was experiencing severe rationing and each person was entitled to only one egg a week. Her father-in-law, sensing her discomfort and sadness, went out of his way to buy her a tiny potted tree that she could trim to simulate a Christmas tree so she would feel better.

What also comes to mind are the many OFW families in the Philippines who will not have a complete cast during noche buena since at least a mother, a father, a brother, or a sister will be missing. The irony is, the “abundance” on the noche buena table and under the tree are courtesy of the ones who are not there.

There are also the policemen and policewomen, firemen, doctors, nurses, security guards and others who must render necessary service, spending the night at their stations making themselves available to people who may need help. They should really be celebrating with loved ones, but whether they like it or not, they show up at their jobs and do the sacrifice for all of us.

We all have our different feelings about this season. We all have our reasons — both profound and shallow — to justify losing not just one’s faith but also one’s good cheer during Christmas.

Natural tragedies, calamities and the horrific acts of violence and terror inflicted by man against man can completely alter our perceptions about life. The simple everyday grind of the season — the debilitating traffic, the never-ending expenses, the uncooperative weather — can also make our celebration of Christmas less than perfect. In fact, it can be a big hassle. Such things can diminish our enjoyment of and the meaning of Christmas.

In the west, there has been the trend to secularize Christmas. No religious icons in department store displays and corporate greetings, but only secular ones like Santa Claus, the Christmas tree, mistletoe and other holiday décor are used. This practice has been gaining ground for some decades now, much to the chagrin of Christians. However, while it may be the fashion for many in the west to take away the Christian aspect in the celebration of the season, the message remains the same — and that is to behave differently. Amid the commercial onslaught and the revelry is a call to spread good cheer among our fellowmen and hope for a better world.

“Peace on earth and goodwill to all men” remains the mantra of Christmas whatever your religious affiliation is, or even if you do not have any. I came across a quote whose source is unknown which goes, “The message of Christmas is that the visible material world is bound to the invisible spiritual world.”

The spirit lives! There are people who profess to no religion or creed but work in shelters, or extend financial, material help to the needy for the simple reason that it is the season for giving. That has to be a good sign.

There will always be suffering in the world and the call of human existence is to make sense of it and deal with it as best as we can. Some will find solace believing in a God who has a reason for everything and that these are all for our own good. Others will embrace freedom in the insight that it is useless to fathom the mind of a nonexistent god and that we must simply be philosophical and deal with the meaninglessness of suffering.

Wherever you may find yourself and whatever the condition of your spirit may be, it is my wish that this Christmas you feel a lightness and grace that will open you up to the goodness that is happening amid the suffering you may encounter or witness. As we pack relief bags and send cash donations for the victims of the flashfloods, let us pause to appreciate that the stars still shimmer in their magnificence. The sunsets are still awesome. There are also many good people in the world sharing the gift of service with laughter, love, generosity and compassion.

It may all be a question of where we are at, or what we wish to focus on. I have had good, “perfect” Christmases and some others that I do not wish to remember or revisit. This year, as I am present and humbly accept the gifts of family, closeness, friendship, revelry and love, and the few material things thrown my way, I am focused on the spirit that animates my consciousness and concern for the poor in spirit and those who suffer. And Lord knows, there are many in our homeland today.

On a personal level, I also extend glad tidings and prayers of hope to those I may be have been in disagreement with on many issues throughout the year and those who I do not particularly like, and especially those who may not like me for one reason or another. It may be the only time of the year when most of us can awaken to a little more positivity, bigness of spirit and hope than we presume we are capable of.

“Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love,” the American essayist Hamilton Wright Mabie once wrote.

Amen.

Maligayang Pasko sa ating lahat!

HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes (The Philippine Star) Updated November 27, 2011

The best things can’t be told. The second best are misunderstood. The third best is conversation, political life, economics and all that. – Heinrich Zimmer (writer, Indologist)

Now that seems like a pretty limiting mindset to have as I write this article on a rainy Tuesday morning. It looks like I am already stating an excuse, or even a judgment on what I am going to be writing about, right at the outset. The very tools a writer uses to write are, of course, words, and the quote above suggests that the very use of words means I am limiting myself with regard to my subject, and worse, the substance of what I wish to express.

And Zimmer is probably correct. The truly great experiences we go through in our lives cannot be captured by words. They are just way too complex, and open-ended. Any attempt will leave us blank, speechless and incoherent and the whole endeavor of trying to write about the best things reduces our work to the second best, which exposes us to being misunderstood, misinterpreted and dismissed as crazy, if we follow what the above quote is suggesting.

And so, to be a good writer and have a good following, we must stick to the “third best thing.” Perhaps. But it does not mean writers do not try to go for the best things. Like Icarus who flew to the sun and saw his wings melt, many writers continue to try. But even when they seem to succeed in describing what they see, Zimmer is suggesting that their attempted flight will never be high enough to really get intimate and describe fully what they see.

And just what are these ‘best things’ that Zimmer refers to? Joseph Campbell, a mythologist and a good friend of Zimmer, ventures that these topics are those that touch the very core of human experience.

God, the Divine, being Awake in the deepest sense such as the attainment of Enlightenment, kensho, satori in Zen experience or other spiritual contexts are just some of them.

One of the first things I learned in Philosophy when I was in college is that language is probably one of man’s earliest technological inventions. He needed to establish some kind of aural references to things to be able to communicate them to his fellow humans. He needed some commonality to reach out to other beings. Thus words were invented. From grunts, to words, to sentences, to syntax to paragraphs, to elaborate speeches with their rules about grammar, man has been able to communicate ever greater chunks of what he has experienced.
But just as man’s experience of reality has made him create words to share what he is going through, it is also true that the use of words, or even speech itself has created new experiences that have defined reality for him. Words are not objective descriptions all the time.

Words are contextual, loaded with meaning and so the use of them also creates meanings and contexts as they describe objectively what is being seen. For example, the word snow may have different emotional, affective meanings to someone who lives in the tundra where it is abundant, and to someone who lives in the desert.

Languages are like operating systems of computers that attempt to make sense of the objective world. Some languages seem more scientific, while some are better at romance or at being personal. Some are seemingly cold and objective while some are more emotional. Each one has its own nuances and sensibility since they have their own point of view, so to speak.

Knowing the complexity of language, many mystics or explorers of the best things of various religious and spiritual practices have taken to silence, or the practice of very limited use of words. This is why many monasteries are quiet places, so that one can soak in the experience of the divine without words getting in the way.

For example, the practice of Zen focuses on ordinary experience which, in an awakened state, is always fresh and even primal. Beyond words, concepts, opinions, takes and explanations, there is only experience that is indescribable.

“Those who know don’t tell and those who tell don’t know,” is a Zen saying that cryptically tries to point this out. Because the moment we try to capture in words what we have experienced, we begin to diminish its nature and stature.

Words necessarily put experiences in neat boxes. For example, expressions and feelings of love must find commonality between giver and receiver. “Only that in you which is me can hear what I’m saying,” said the philosopher Baba Ram Dass. Therefore, more often than not, to be understood means to express love in the clichés found in Halllmark cards.

So what’s the message in all this?

It is a paradox that those who speak the truth end up ‘lying’ since to start with, the very attempt to speak about what cannot be defined, captured or talked about is already some sort of misrepresentation.

That’s why the word “paradox” was invented to capture what seem to be two conflicting realities that, when put together, present a higher truth.

And yet the compulsion that seizes one who has experienced “the best things” is to talk about it and spread the word. And to speak the truth about the experience, one must lie. To tell it like it is, one must use metaphor. To point out the inexpressible, indescribable, one must use words.

To be a writer of truth therefore is a contradiction in terms. And that’s the truthful paradox, or the paradoxical truth.

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I am offering my LAST workshop for the year 2011– Photography on Dec. 10, Saturday, from 1 to 6:30PM. Venue is 113 B. Gonzales, Loyola Heights, QC. Call 0916-8554303/ 426-5375. Cost is 3920 includes VAT. Reserve now.

HUMMING IN MY UNIVERSE By Jim Paredes (The Philippine Star) Updated October 23, 2011

We did not choose our parents, or relatives. We had no choice in choosing the sex we were born with. Consider the geography of where you were born, and I am pretty sure it was not your choosing.

A few other things were pretty much determined for us as well — our place and ranking, sequence–wise, in our families, left or right-handedness, social class, our DNA that pretty much determines the unfolding and the unraveling of how our physical bodies play out in terms of height, complexion, hair color, body type, eye color, general health, intelligence, etc.

If you were hardware, you were pretty much pre-configured when your parents had you, with a lot of software apps and bugs thrown in. With the proper food, nutrition and care, one can say that you will generally be expected to play out your life within some expected parameters. If you were born short or sickly, for example, you probably would avoid certain athletic activities, like basketball, as you grew up.

There are, of course, exceptions to the rule. There are many stories about people who broke with their past, went against their history and pulled off incredible surprises, and in the process, told marvelous stories of unlimited human potential.

But let me go back to where I started. I wish to explore the view of archetypal psychologist James Hillman who suggests that perhaps certain things were meant to be. In his book, The Soul’s Code, he wrote about the strangeness of certain human stories: a stranger comes to town, has a night of passion with a local girl who conceives a child after the brief encounter. Hillman suggests that, perhaps, the heavens conspired for these certain gene types to meet and result in humans with specific characteristics and talents to be born and carry out certain specific divine missions. In short, the meeting was pre-ordained to produce the “right stuff.” What a staggering thought!

Now walk with me on this and extend that idea further: that everyone you meet, and every place you are in, and every circumstance you find yourself enmeshed in is divinely meant to be. I know that the very concept of pre-determination goes against the grain of freedom, free will and the belief that one is the architect of one’s own life, concepts that are so ingrained in the modern mind.

But the very idea that everything that happens in life is part of a divine plan playing out has its many epiphanies. Sometimes, as I amble along my favorite walking paths in the Ateneo campus in Loyola, I spot new floral buds in a bunch of varied plants, or fallen leaves beautifully scattered about in artful randomness. I also detect the chirping of different birds, the growth of new grass, the cloud formations, other strangers traversing the same path, and a million other things happening. In those moments, I allow the idea of pre-determination to take hold and think that these are actually phenomena thrown along my life path for me to acknowledge and appreciate.

When I go with that thought and consider that their showing up at that exact moment in my life is a fulfillment of their divine mission and “appointment” with me, I reel in pure delight and enchantment.

The exquisiteness of the timing, the perfect divine staging is impeccable.

When I extend the idea to other activities like my meals, for example, I can’t help but have a holy appreciation for the rice, the fish and vegetables on the table, and the glass of water that is served me. I wax mystical at the particularity of the specific objects in front of me and I am left to wonder even more.

If I imagine that this particular fish on the table is here to keep his appointment with me for this specific meal held at this time and place, then I marvel even more at the elaborateness of the “conspiracy.”

This conspiracy is endlessly intricate and goes ever deeper involving countless people, events and things: from my maid who prepared and cooked it, to the market vendor who sold it, to the fisherman who caught it, to the ocean that nourished it. It goes on and on to the beginning of time itself. Could these be more than just random human activities at play here?

Einstein once said “God does not play dice,” implying that there is an intelligence unfolding in the universe, and the events that unfold are not as random and mindless as they seem to be. Perhaps it is true. I really don’t know.

But what I do know is that our intelligence is not evolved enough to figure out everything, including the simple question we often ask when things go wrong: “Why do these things happen to me?”

Sometimes, I am tempted to go along fully with the thought that everything does and will indeed happen as well and perfectly as they should, regardless of how we feel about it. We don’t know what they are, or when, much less why they happen. But having the frame of mind that events in the world are keeping their “appointments” awakens me to the genius who wrote the appointment book.

And being awake to this is the most holy way I can respond to such an eternal, elaborately divine effort. It awakens me to the notion that my own life is part of the big conspiracy, the cosmic plan. When I pay attention to any small thing — a scenery, a flower, a person, a conversation, a glance; when I notice the ordinary; when I have empathy, I may be consciously doing my part in the scheme of things. Paying attention is my way of fulfilling the “appointment” to the best of my ability.

I am not being self-absorbed here thinking that everything happens exclusively to a “me” that is experiencing everything. The universe does not revolve around me. I humbly submit to the reality that I am also a cog in someone’s wheel of life experiences. I play my part when I meet other people and probably play it very well when I am attentive, loving, joyful, compassionate and non-judgmental.

The implications of are mind-boggling. For one, it opens me up to the idea that every mundane thing, event, every person is special. But then, when everyone and everything is “special,” nothing is really special — a sure paradox.

In a paradox, words trip and talk in seeming contradiction to capture a reality too big to imagine, as in “One must lose his life to gain it.”

And I know for certain that, where there is paradox, there lies a beautiful, eternal truth.

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1) If you have been using your DSLR camera like a point and shoot, it’s time to learn how to use it properly. Basic Photography Workshop on Oct. 29, Saturday. 1 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. You must have a DSLR. Call 0916-8554303 or 426-5375. Or write to jpfotojim@gmail for questions or reservations.

2) Tapping the Creative Universe (six-session run): A cutting-edge experience. The most soulfully liberating workshop you can attend! Nov. 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 21 from 7 to 9 p.m. Call or write for info. Or check http://jimparedes-workshops.com.